Dear Cookie,
Sunday, December 4, 2011
, 12:41 AM
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I know you probably won't read this at all, but maybe someday you might read it.
I know it's tough for you,as i keep on bugging you on and on, especially when you are busy.
I might not be the one out there for you, but i hope i might be someday.
It actually hurts real bad, knowing that it'll never be.
I know i'm not the best out there, I know i'm not your type.
I was stupid last time, for treating you the way you shouldn't be treated.
I should have told you the truth, but i was an idiot.
I'm an idiot to follow words that aren't supposed to be followed.
I should have went back and told you what you assume was wrong.
I should have chased you back.
I should have been there for you when you were in pain.
But i was an idiot to think that staying away was the only answer.
I was just a coward, afraid of the pain held inside.
I was selfish, only caring about myself and neglected you.
On and off, i told you how i felt about you.
But every time i ended up backing away, because i was scared about the truth.
Time and time i tried talking to you, speaking out little by little.
Somehow, it doesn't seem to be going far, have i ever crossed your mind?
There are times where i'm even afraid to start a conversation with you.
I'm afraid i might disturb you, I'm afraid of you finding me annoying.
Several times I've tried, tho it was always in a jokingly manner or at times, a serious manner;
I've always taken it seriously, and each time i heard your reply, was each time i broke myself.
I'm really sorry for the wrong things that I've done, the times I've hurt you, neglected you, or ignored you.
I apologize for all the bads that I've done.
You've taught me much over the times, and i thank you for helping me whenever i'm in trouble.
I know it might not be, but i just hope you'll know.
I really wish that time would turn back, but it's never happening huh?
I guess all that's left is a 'regret'.
I really love you, i really do.
I know i might be bugging you from time to time, i promise i won't disturb when you're busy no more.
I guess i'll be staying, but i'll be hiding;
One might be there, but the others just ain't.
I hope that you'll accept my apology, i'm really sorry.
You've taught me 'never to give a chance, but only accept if it's true'
I love you, and i'm here to stay.
But, will you?
I hope so, but you can't force it, right?
I guess i'll end it here, i'm sorry if this bothered you or wasted your time.
But i hope you understand, I'm sure you will right?
*4th Dec note:
And look what i've found after reading through my old posts. LOL
I'm here to stay and wait for you,
I've made up my mind;
I love you,
And it'll be.
<3
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